Doubting Thomas
by truglasgowgal
Summary: Sometimes people just need a little reassurance. Mouse visits Jay in Hospital. Post 3x01


Just a wee thing that I wanted to write after the ep. Took its flipping time coming together and the editing process was a nightmare, but I think I ended up with something vaguely resembling what I hoped to achieve going in! No doubt the new episode'll trash it to pieces mind, but that's another matter ;)

Hope you enjoy…

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 **Title:** Doubting Thomas  
 **Disclaimer:** I own nothing.  
 **Summary:** Sometimes people just need a little reassurance. Mouse visits Jay in Hospital. Post 3x01

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" _Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.  
_ ' _Pooh!' he whispered.  
_ ' _Yes, Piglet?'  
_ ' _Nothing,' said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. 'I just wanted to be sure of you.'"  
_ _ **A. A. Milne, 'The House at Pooh Corner'**_

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Jay's eyes shifted and he squinted, trying to get better read on the figure lingering in the doorway; it hardly compensated for his already restricted vision, but at least it showed he was still alive. Besides, he already knew who was watching over him, he just didn't know why.

"Mouse."

Jay cleared his throat, tried to shuffle himself further up the bed without wincing in a way that took over his whole face – a very obvious _fuck you_ from the rest of his body for having to put up with all this shit.

"I'll get that," Mouse spoke up, launching into action, "I can – I can do that for you." He crossed the room quickly and went to work sorting the pillows behind Jay's back.

He was quick and efficient about it, like every dexterous challenge that required his attention, but his eyes kept flickering over to Jay every time he plumped the cushion or straightened the cover. Jay wasn't sure if his friend was cataloguing his injuries or simply checking he was still there, but either way, it didn't go unnoticed.

"Thanks, man." Jay sank back into the comfortable support with a grateful sigh.

Mouse hovered over him, shuffling from foot to foot, fingers twisting around one another now they had nothing to burn up their nervous energy.

"Shouldn't you be at work? What're you doing here?" he asked, turning his head to look up at his friend through his one good eye. When Mouse didn't say anything, just looked quickly to the door, Jay dropped his tone, "You didn't bring the rest of the unit with you, did you? You know I can't be doing with all that handholding shtick."

"Nah, nah, nah, just me," Mouse declared. His hands dropped, taking his gaze with them, picking at a thread Jay couldn't even see. "The Sarge, he, uh, he told me to cut out early, go home and get some shut-eye, ye know? But when you didn't come back with rest of the team… well, your name was on the admissions list here, see? An' so I thought maybe if I just dropped by to check in on you that'd do the trick."

Any other time he might've made a quip about Mouse living up to his namesake and getting into places he shouldn't, like always. Or mentioned how that list of networks he was tapped into was getting pretty extensive.

Except right now Mouse was frowning down at the hospital bed, the rapid patter of his fingers on the comforter causing Jay's arm to jump. Jay looked to the Morse Code messages Mouse was sending to himself, while Mouse fixated on the needle sunk into the skin on the back of his hand.

Fuck.

"I'm ok," Jay assured him; though his delivery lacked some of the sincerity of his intent. Half of his mouth was blood red and every time he added inflection it felt like he was prolonging the bruising. "Really. Docs say I'll be out of here tomorrow. No lasting damage. Still as pretty as ever." He cracked a smile and winked at his friend, hoping he could keep it together long enough not to bleed all over the white bedsheets and everything he was trying to do here.

Mouse swallowed, eyes narrowing. His fingers stilled, pressing deeper indentations into the hospital mattress. "There was a, uh, a video," he said. "Keyes sent it to the precinct and the team, they all watched it. Bumped it on down to me along with the C.I. files I was supposed to be forging. 'Cept that didn't go so well, ye know? Wasn't expecting all that scrutiny." His eyes widened and shrunk in quick succession as he looked to Jay then back to the IV line drip feeding him pain relief. "I had it running in the background, goin' through all the programs, an' that thing was on a loop like all night, but I was getting nothing, nada, squat. So I figured just mute it, right? Minimize the visuals, concentrate on the files, but by that point it's all like seared into my brain. They've got you strung up on one of those hooks like they use for dead cows in meat freezers and these two guys they're jus' beatin' on you, an' then they start layin' in on you with the tasers and – " Mouse looked up at him as sharply as he'd cut himself off, biting his lower lip, skin taut and creasing across his forehead. "I screwed up with files, man. I'm sorry. An' then we lost Lindsay an' the Sergeant had to practically spoon feed me the shit to analyze so we could pinpoint your location." He was shaking his head from side to side again, like that would rattle out the residual effects. "I jus' kept seeing them hitting you, an' that _sound_ , I couldn't get it out of my head."

One hand flew up, a tight claw swiping through the air to knock against his temple.

"You were trying not to scream," Mouse said, swallowing, hands now twisting in the grooves between his sides, his arms crossed over his chest. "S'been a long time since I've heard that. A long, long time. Forgot – forgot what it sounded like."

"Hey! Mouse!" He jolted, blinking at Jay's assurance, "I can take it. Come on, you know that. It's what we were trained for, right?"

"Yeah," Mouse sounded distant, his eyes glazing over again. "I guess it follows you everywhere, huh?"

Jay wasn't touching that one with a ten-foot pole; too many memories covered in moon dust.

"You got to me, right?" Jay reminded him of his part; of the mission considered success whether it was on home soil or overseas. "You sent Lindsay in, the team breeched the house, I got a ride to this place and a bed for the night. And I've got the week off," he concluded with a flourish. He made sure he had Mouse's eyes on his when he reiterated, "I'm gonna be ok."

Jay tried for a smile again, mouth lifting on his other side in a conscious effort to cover his bloody teeth tracks.

The nod was more a jerk than true belief or agreement, but it was acknowledgement and right now that would do.

Jay eyed his friend. "Someone give you a ride over here?" He looked to the door, but didn't see anyone lingering outside, no shadow by the observation window either.

"Couple of uniforms," Mouse said, still jittery as Hell. "Didn't, ah, catch their names though."

Jay took the opening. "You wanna stick around?"

Mouse's rapid nod of the head followed. "I can – I can do that, yeah."

"Pull up a pew," Jay told him and gestured to the chair by the wall.

Mouse dragged it close to his bedside and then hunkered down in the seat, clear view of the door and the windows on both sides.

"Hey, Mouse," Jay said, grabbing his friend's attention for himself, "Thanks for looking out for me."

"Eyes and ears, right?" Mouse remarked. "S'what I'm here for."

Jay nodded and the twitch of his friend's mouth in return was enough for now.

They'd be ok.

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"' _Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?'_ _  
_ _'Supposing it didn't,' said Pooh after careful thought._ _  
_ _Piglet was comforted by this."_ _ **  
A. A. Milne, 'The House at Pooh Corner'**_

.

 **The End.**

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Thanks for reading, hope you liked it.  
Steph  
xxx


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